Chicago Hash House Harriers

The Tale of the Trail
The Chicago Hash 26 Dec 2010 by Horn-E

This was set by Chicken Stifer out of O’Lanagans. All right, it wasn’t a bad trail, but you didn’t read that here. The marks were mostly good considering the snow. Chicken Stifer wasn’t at the start, but we found marks and had a quick chalk talk. There was yet another small pack. Only three Chicago hashers, Lifa, Up Loader and Horn-E. We actually had more visitors then Chicago Hashers and we were joined by Prick Of The Litter, AC/DC, Morning Missile, and his sister, Escrowtum. We took off through the park and then headed west across Western. Lifa was leading here as we struggled through several marks that left us guessing as to what they where. Damn locals. But we finally headed south and back to Montrose, just east of the river for a Check. This allowed us to regroup as Escrowtum was more of a walker and she just arrived as Lifa found trail through a gate and past an apartment and to the riverside path. Somehow towards the end, the trail headed down an alley and Up Loader led us here. At the end of the alley was a car stuck in the snow. Lifa in all of his generosity, talked Morning Missile and the one armed plow truck to push the poor bastard out. Again, we almost all regrouped. We were now heading over to Western and then south. Horn-E tried to hold back a bit to show Escrowtum the way and lost track of the others. And as the trail started to turn at every corner, he lost track of her and what happened after that is speculation. And I won’t. Escrowtum finally gave up and went back to the bar. Horn-E tried to follow trail, through alleys, gangways and finally over to this hospital parking lot. There was this spray of flour. Was it a Check. Turn. Split, Back Check. Or even a BN. There were plows everywhere. Guessing a Check, Horn-E went west and out of the area, going back and forth and finding not another mark. Meanwhile, the rest of the pack was on the top deck of the multistory parking garage, hiding in a stairway, drinking beer. Back at the bar we waited about ten minutes before the beer stop crew and hare arrived. Along with Virgin Banger, Humpty Dumpty and some guy names Just Matt. All drunk. And Humpty Dumpty and Just Matt were carrying on like two thirteen year olds on their first drunk. Lifa tried to hold circle, but it was to chaotic and beer was being thrown around, including on the pool table. We ended circle quickly. But out hare got a few. We were also joined by another visitor, Just Edwin who might make the TH3 run this week and a hash on Sun. The terrible two, started to throw beer at each other and Virgin Banger finally got them out of the bar and into a cab. Did that cab end up on the news? We restarted another circle and had some fun. Finally shortly after six, the last of the Chicago Hashers left, besides Horn-E holding fort with all five of the visitors still there. We finally left around 8:30. And I want to thank all of the visitors for joining us, even though we only had three Chicago Hashers on trail.

On On
Horn-E

The Tale of the Trail
The Chicago Hash 12 Dec 2010 by Horn-E

Here we go again. Last week, Happy Ass Grabber advertised the TH3 Hash with “Shitty weather=great hash”. It wasn’t that bad and either was the hash. And this day wasn’t that bad for a Chicago Hash. Back before I joined the hash, the Chicago Hash ran a decent trail on the day Chicago hit its lowest temp ever, -28 degrees with a -80 degree wind chill. This just wasn’t that bad. There were gusts of maybe thirty and they helped cool me off after wearing to many layers of clothes. The temps were in the 20s. Not bad at all while running. Hoosier Daddy and Just Lisa laid trail using blue flour and it all, all, held up. We ran from the Red Line Tap and it was heavy metal day with people with tattoos and piercings and leather and levis everywhere. And stuff for sale. We weren’t interested. We are hashers. And finally the pack arrived. Horn-E was first and Lifa was last and there was no one else coming out on this great day for hashing. Just the two most prolific hashers in town. And Lifa even drove from Wheaton or wherever he lives, just for this hash. Where were you? “Shitty weather=great hash”. There were two four legged hounds to join us on trail, Dingo(?) and Loka(?). Loka was really enjoying the snow and wind. Dingo ended up being carried for part of the trail by Hoosier Daddy.
Meanwhile, Lifa and Horn-E took off on trail. Heading west, we ran about three blocks before we found our first Check. Lifa was ahead to the west. Horn-E opted for the wind at his back and headed south and was soon on. Some trees were even marked with blue. Trail headed south for a bit and then further west. Horn-E was still leading with Just Lisa and Loka following. This led to a Split. By now Lifa was there and Horn-E headed south in an alley. On. He blew the horn, but in the wind, I think the sound was heard on Devon instead of around the corner and up wind. By the time he got to the end of the alley, he finally spotted Lifa and waved him on. Another Check. Horn-E headed further west and found nothing. Lifa wandered around and finally found trail to the east. At this point he was running with our sweep Just Lisa and Loka. We headed east all of the way to the El tracks and then went on a big loop to the south. Along the way I encountered the Abominable Snowman caring some fresh game. No wait. That was Hoosier Daddy carrying Dingo. I ran on. The trouble with going south with the wind meant we had to go north to return. Against the wind. And we did and it felt great. I had so many layers of shirts on that I was sweating and need the cool relief. We did find another Check heading towards the lake. We must have ran around for ten minutes before Lifa finally found marks down an alley to the north. And there was Hoosier Daddy waiting for us. From here it was several more blocks before we finally got back to the Red Line Tap.
We held a quick CH3 Meeting and decided that we wouldn’t pay any Hash Cash today, but each buy our own beer. Our decision was aided by the fact that it was dollar glass day. We held a quick circle and Lifa sang another Christmas song for us.
Then Lifa decided to leave after one beer because of his long, hour or longer, ride home. And just after he left, Fistful Of Pricks came in. When asked why she didn’t get there for the hash, she just smiled. And then Just Lisa decided to leave to find parking at home. Hoosier Daddy was also going to leave for the same reason. And Horn-E dressed and headed out to the El. And the weather wasn’t bad enough to have an all time low attendance for CH3. Just two. Really hashers, lets get out there. “Shitty weather=great hash”