Author: Snatch Squatch

Tale of the Trail – CH3 #1407

Chicago H3 Run 1407 – 10/16/2005

The final score was 28 to 3: 28 splits and 3 checks that is. Oh, there were probably a few dozen more, but after a solid 80 minutes of trail without the aid of beer, cognitive function begins to deteriorate.

About 10 hashers headed out from Rabbits on Sunday to experience what hare Rear Loader described as “not a typical Rear Loader trail.” We weren’t sure what this meant but after listening to the hare whine about how tired he was after setting the trail on just 4 hours sleep, we figured he must mean it would suck.

We started out north along Elston but the trail quickly made a sharp turn and we ended up heading west instead. We zigged and zagged back and forth for several blocks giving the walkers a chance to keep up. The first check at Robert Square Park (okay, I admit I had to look that one up) managed to spread the pack apart with false trails in several directions. Our one-and-only virgin Just ????? took the middle route through the park, but Horn-E found the way, with Chicken Stiffer and Lifa catching up as we crossed the Kennedy on the Ainslie bridge.

On Lawrence we found the “Polish” check as promised by the hare. Our Polish representative (C.S.) skipped it, using some lame excuse about finding true trail. We trampled through the greenery at Wilson Park and finally ended up at a very tough check at Central and Lawrence. The third arrow was found 1/4 mile from the check by Horn-E, who by then had slipped into a parallel universe and wasn’t seen again until the finish.

As though all of this weren’t enough torture, 3 or 4 more splits awaited us at Milwaukee & Foster with the trail crossing over itself at least once. Homeboy Org-G figured this out and helped the clueless get back on true trail. From here it would be a straight shot back in. Wrong! 8-10 more splits and lots of winding through the neighborhood added another mile or so to the trail.

The smart ones (shortcutting bastards and biatches) were already back and into their second beer by the time the DFLs arrived. While Canned Pussy exchanged notes about mobile phones and Just Do Me Slowly wondered “what is a mobile phone?,” our virgin R.A. Chicken Stiffer called the circle to order. Most of the entertainment was provided by Coffee, Tea or Me’s psychotic dog chasing after shadows in the middle of the circle. Hot pants arrived late accompanied by his bodyguard. He explained he wasn’t able to run because he was grilling his meat, and that he couldn’t stay because he was on his way to grill his brother’s meat. I don’t wanna know. Erik the Red somehow avoided receiving a down-down yet again. Just as the circle closed, the GM made her grand entrance. We figured she must’ve been hiding in the parking lot critiquing Chicken Stiffer’s performance as R.A.

Thanks to the hare for a good, long trail, the R.A. for perfect weather and the Bears for keeping the riff raff away.

Mismanagement Meeting

Tonight’s MM Mtg will be held at the Holdiay Club on Sheridan at 8pm.

I’ll buy pizza, and we’ll get some beer rolling. Stop by, share a
drink with friends, and contribute some input to YOUR HASH!!!!

It’s really important that “newbies” start to work their way into
our MM team so that we same ‘ole, stale folk have new blood in the
pipeline!

Here’re a few of the items on the agenda for tonight;

– Current Finances
– PAWS Aide Station
– Marathon Beer Stop
– Winter Habadashery
– Introduce new MM position – Virgin Master!
– Discuss Co-GM’s for next election
– Hash Ball Committee – needs to start forming

See you tonight!

Too Loose

Marathon Beer Stop 2005

Hashers:
The Chicago Marathon is on Oct. 9 this year. For almost ten years I have been going out around mile 23 and handing out beer to hashers as they ran by. Over the last several years we really expanded until we gave away three kegs of Goose Island beer two years ago. That was about 1800 cups of beer or about 5% of the Marathoners got a taste as they ran by. That was outstanding. Then last year we got busted by the cops. We got out there a little to soon and the last cop cruising the scene saw us and reported us. Of course we shut down right away, and we never even tapped a keg.
That brings us to this year. Do we do anything? What do we do? I was suggesting that we each bring out our own donations (sixers or a case) and some cups and keep all of our beer hidden in back packs or bags or whatever we have to do to keep it low key and hidden. That we can coordinate later.
Then Peterbilt passed on some information about Pabst Blue Ribbon maybe wanting to do something with the hash. So I called this person and established contact. I explained our history with the Marathon and suggested that they might want to donate ten cases or so. They have liability concerns, so their donation is to us and what we do with it is our business. We have no problem with that. She also suggested that we at least let the Marathoners know what they are getting. I suggested that we carry a can and several cups and pour it right there so they can see the can. Shouldn’t be a problem. They will get back to us later if they want to do that idea.
They also suggested that they work with us through bars were they would negotiate a price for us. They could do it with the small Moon hashes or large Chicago or Thirstday hashes. Sounds good. I did specify that I would want this for all of the area hashes and I was not jumping in first with the Moon Hashes. Who knows. Maybe a different hash each month in different locations that serve Pabst. But we GMs need to get together on this and what we can do for the area hashes.
I made a preliminary venture that I specified would be separate from anything else that might me done, because the Marathon is only 30 days away and the time is clicking down. I specified that this should in no way interfere in any other future discussions with all of the hashes.

In the interval, direct your Marathon ideas to me, including getting some Pabst beer to give out, or what to do if they decide they don’t want to do the Marathon.

Direct your ideas about Pabst future considerations to your GMs.

Meanwhile, we GMs need to get together over the next week or so and see what we collectively would want and separately want as far as Pabst is concerned. Perhaps even a generic shirt something like “Chicago Area Hashes get pissed on PBR.”
This would also make a good discussion for [email protected].

On On
Horn-E