Author: Snatch Squatch

CH3 #1826

Chicago HHH Run #1826

Sunday 1/20 – 2:00 PM

Hares: Snatchsquatch & R Tard E

Venue: Shoe’s Pub – 1134 W. Armitage

Hash Cash: $8

From da GM: Mt. Schwiiinga had to bail, but she found us a kickass bar – they’re giving us cheap pitchers and even cheaper shots of Malort. The bar is also dog-friendly, so bring your furry friends.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Hop on the Brown Line and ride it south to Armitage. Head downstairs and then walk west on Armitage until you hit the bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Hoof it north to Armitage and ride the 73 Armitage bus east to Armitage and Seminary. Hop off the bus and then hoof it back west to the bar.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Armitage and Clifton. Good luck finding a parking spot.

Erection Nominations 2013

2013 Hash Ballot Nominations
FEATUREDPosted on January 14, 2013 by SnatchSquatch
Greetings all ye wankers and bimbos, your friendly neighborhood Snatchsquatch here with a very important announcement.

Since it is now January that means it is time to start thinking about the Hash Ballot and Hash Erections – as we’ve done in the past, every member of the hash will have a vote for every Chicago Hash they attended with an additional vote for every trail they hared/event they helped plan in 2012. For example, if you attended 10 runs and hared twice, you’d have 12 points (10+2=12) – these numbers count ONLY Chicago H3 events, and not any of the other hashes in the area. I’ve tried to take attendance (along with Chicken, Lifa, and Rainbow), but I’m not perfect. Please take the time to review the attendance sheet as it now appears at the top of this page – along the top of the page you’ll find a tab for “Records” that includes a link to the “2012 Attendance,” please double check that I’ve correctly marked all the hashes that you attended so that you’ll have the right number of votes in the upcoming Erection. If I’ve erred, please let me know by the end of January and I will correct my attendance figures. You have until Jan 31st to contact me, as voting starts on Feb 1st and lasts until Feb 22nd.

Secondly, we need nominations for the Hash Erection – I’ve tried to remember as much as possible, but again, I’m not perfect. Please view the “2013 Hash Ballot Nominations” document that is also located under the “Records” tab on the page – it includes our usual list of awards as well as a space to nominate somebody for GM (please note, if you nominate anyone other than yourself for GM, I will double-check with them to make sure they actually want to be GM, so don’t go nominating somebody as a joke). Just like the number of votes, you have until Jan 31st to nominate somebody for a Hash Erection Award and voting will take place from Feb 1st until Feb 22nd with the awards being given out at Hash Ball on Feb 23rd. If you need help jogging your memory (especially if you get CH3 and TH3 runs confused), check out the “2012 Runs” link, also under the “Records” tab.

As always, thank you for your time, and I look forward to seeing all of you at upcoming hashes.

On-On,
Snatchsquatch

CH3 #1825

Chicago HHH Run #1825

Sunday 1/13 – 2:00 PM

Hares: Caught Red Headed & The Dark Kunt

Venue: IHOP – 3760 N. Halsted

View CH3 Bar Map in a larger map
Hash Cash: $8

From da Hares: This will be an A-to-B trail, and your bags will be transported for you. Be sure to grab some pancakes before trail!

From da GM: I swear to God, if the B is Beaumont’s I am going to murder somebody!

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Take the 8 Halsted bus north to the end of the line. Exit the bus and walk north on Broadway until you get to the intersection of Broadway, Halsted, and Grace. If you can’t find the IHOP from there, you’re an idiot.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Take the 72 North Ave bus east over to Halsted. Exit the bus and transfer onto the 8 Halsted bus heading north and ride it until the end of the line. Exit the bus and walk north on Broadway until you get to the intersection of Broadway, Halsted, and Grace. If you can’t find the IHOP from there, you’re an idiot.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Halsted, Broadway, and Grace. Get your car towed for parking in the IHOP parking lot and for not buying all the pancakes.

CH3 #1824

Chicago HHH Run #1824

Sunday 1/6 – 2:00 PM

Hares: Just Chris, Just Ernie, Just Jay, & Just Nick

Venue: Drum & Monkey – 1435 W. Taylor St

View CH3 Bar Map in a larger map

From da GM: Not one. Not two, but FOUR “Justs” laying trail together. Yeah, there’s zero chance this one will be a disaster.

Hash Cash: $8

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Hop on the Brown Line and ride that sucker South to Washington/Wells. Transfer over to the Pink Line and ride it West to Polk. Head downstairs and hoof it east over to Ashland, then south to Taylor, and back east to the bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Hop on the 9 Ashland Bus and ride it south to Taylor. Hoof it east over to the bar.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Taylor and Loomis. Park your car and hope some UIC student doesn’t break in and pass out in the backseat.

CH3 #1823

Chicago HHH Run #1823

Sunday 12/30 – 2:00 PM

Hares: Snatchsquatch

Venue: Joe’s On Weed – 940 W. Weed St

View CH3 Bar Map in a larger map

From da GM: Wait, what? I’m still recovering from Anthrax, ask again later.

Hash Cash: $8

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Hop on the Red Line and ride that sucker south to North/Clybourn stop. Hoof it west on North over to Fremont, then south to Weed. Head west on Weed until you find the bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Take the 72 North Bus East to Sheffield. Hoof it a block south to Weed and then east over to the bar.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Fremont and Weed, circle the block forever and ever looking for parking.

CH3 #1822

Chicago HHH Run #1822

Sunday 12/23 – 2:00 PM

Hares: Chicken Stiffer

Venue: Atlantic Bar & Grill – 5062 N. Lincoln Ave

View CH3 Bar Map in a larger map

Hash Cash: $8

From da Hare: Its my birthday! Make me drink!

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Brown Line to Western. Transfer to the 49 Western Bus north and exit at Winnemac. Hoof it a block west to Winnemac & Lincoln, bar is just north of the parking lot on the northwest corner of the intersection.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Take the 49 Western Bus north and exit at Winnemac. Hoof it a block west to Winnemac & Lincoln, bar is just north of the parking lot on the northwest corner of the intersection.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Winnemac and Lincoln, there is a lot next to the bar for your lazy ass.

CH3 #1821

Chicago HHH Run #1821

Anthrax 2012 Hangover

Sunday 12/16 – 11:00 AM

Hares: That Thing That Vibrates & Glitter Spitter

Venue: 31st Beach – Approx. 31st St & Moe Dr.

View Larger Map

Hash Cash: $5

From da Hares: We’ll be starting extra early for this one, as the hash will be meeting up with the boys from Tailgate 32 before starting out hangover trail. This will be A to B with transportation for whatever you need to the end.

From da GM: For those who are too hungover from the main event or just too lazy to walk more than five minutes from an El stop to hash, the on-after will be Four Treys (3333 N. Damen) and you’re more than welcome to join us there once we’re done. And no, we won’t be running straight to Four Treys from the tailgate, we’ll be running to an undisclosed El stop, at which point we’ll all take the CTA to the on-after.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Red Line to Roosevelt. Hoof it east over to Michigan Ave and hop on the 3 King Drive Bus heading south. Ride that pony down to 31st St. Hoof it east to Moe Drive. Head north just a touch and you’ll find the entrance to the tailgate parking lot. Look for the Tailgate 32 RV for the start of trail.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to Jackson. Transfer to the Red Line and then head south to Roosevelt. Hoof it east over to Michigan Ave and hop on the 3 King Drive Bus heading south. Ride that pony down to 31st St. Hoof it east to Moe Drive. Head north just a touch and you’ll find the entrance to the tailgate parking lot. Look for the Tailgate 32 RV for the start of trail.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to 31st and Moe Drive. Pay out the ass for Bears tailgating parking.

CH3 #1820

Chicago HHH Run #1820
Anthrax 2012
Saturday 12/15 – 1:00 PM
Hares: R Tard E, WJew-40 & Rusty Grundle
Venue: O’Neil’s On Wells – 411 S. Wells St
Hash Cash: $65

From da GM: This is it, the main event. We’ll have an especially shitty trail through the heart of downtown Chicago, awesome food, a t-shirt, tag, and hazmat suit, and the bar all to ourselves for this event.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Brown Line to Quincy/Wells. Head downstairs and hoof it South on Wells to the bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to LaSalle. Head upstairs and hoof it West on Congress to Wells and then North to the bar.

Driving
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Wells and Congress. There might be parking, but let’s be honest, you’re not driving to this one.

CH3 #1819

Chicago HHH Run #1819
Anthrax 2012 Pre-Lube
Friday 12/14 – 7:00 PM
Hares: Lifa & Clark Kunt
Venue: Irish Eyes – 2519 N. Lincoln Ave
Hash Cash: $25

From da Hares: We have two trail options for you – you can choose from a typical Chicago trail with two beer stops, or you can choose a pub crawl trail with pre-arranged drink specials. Both groups will then meet up at the on-in for several hours of drinking and debauchery. Both of these options are A-B and runners will have your bags and all other necessities transported for you.

From da GM: For those possibly coming into town late, have other obligations earlier in the evening, or inclined to get lost on trail when a city uses a freaking grid system – this hash will be winding up at the O’Malley’s West (2249 N. Lincoln Ave) just down the street from Irish Eyes. We’ll have the upstairs to ourselves starting at 10PM and have beer and food available. Don’t be afraid to join us later if you can.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Brown Line to Diversey. Hoof it South on Sheffield and then turn South on Lincoln. Bar will be on the East side of the street.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: 73 Armitage Bus East to the Armitage Brown Line. Transfer to the El and take the Brown Line North to Diversey. Hoof it South on Sheffield and then turn South on Lincoln. Bar will be on the East side of the street.

Driving
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Lincoln and Lill. This is an A to B trail and this is Lincoln Park, so you’ve going to have to walk back to your car to feed the meter.

Anthrax 2012

Anthrax 2012

Anthrax 2012
The Great Chicago Anthrax Scare & Santa Hat Run

Dec 13th-16th, 2012

Biohazard Madness Since 2002

Nothing says that the holidays are just around the corner like donning your finest hazmat suit and your favorite santa hat and romping around downtown Chicago trying to scare the hell out of all the holiday shoppers. Now in our eleventh year, The Great Chicago Anthrax Scare & Santa Hat Run is back once again in 2012.

We’ve got a truly memorable weekend in store for everyone this time out, so don’t be shy – there are only 130 spaces available so be sure to rego right away for this disaster of biblical proportions!

You have two pricing options for this weekend – the first is an all-inclusive package that covers the cost of trails on Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. The second option covers only the cost of Saturday’s main event. Don’t worry though, if you don’t know your schedule in advance you can pay at the door for all events, though you will wind up paying a little extra if you can’t make up your mind early.

Weekend Package

INCLUDES:

Thirstday (12/13 – 7PM) – $8 a’la carte
Your regularly scheduled Thirstday trail haired by O’Shitty Runch

Friday (12/14 – 7PM) – $25 a’la carte
Your Choice of a Mini-Pub Crawl with Pre-Negotiated Drink Specials or a Regular Hash Trail with 2 Beer Stops
Transportation for Your Bags From The Start to the Finish
Both Groups Meet Up to End the Night @ Beaumont’s With Hours of Pizza & Beer

Saturday (12/15 – 1PM) – $45-$65 a’la carte ($45 until Nov 5th, $55 until Dec 12th, $65 after)
Private Party @ O’Neil’s on Wells
Awesome Food
Long Sleeve Hash Shirt & Tag Immortalizing the Event with a design by Mt. Schwiiinga
Customizable Hazmat Suit to wear on trail (markers not included)
Chicago-style Circle RAed by one of our Veteran RAs
Limitless Debauchery

Sunday (12/16 – 11AM) – $8 a’la carte
Hangover trail beginning at the Bears-Packers tailgate
Extra long, extra shitty circle

COST:
$75 (until Nov 5th) – $31 savings
$85 (until Dec 12th)* – $21 savings

* – no guarantee of a shirt, tag, or a hazmat suit if regoing after Dec 1st

Payment Options:

(1) Fill out the paypal form at right.**

(2) Download the registration form, print & fill it out, and pay Snatchsquatch at your next Chicago H3 Hash.

(3) Download the registration form, print & fill it out, and mail it along with a check payable to “Brett Gray” to the following address:

B. Gray
4306 N. Saint Louis Ave 3C
Chicago, IL 60618

(4) Show up the day of the event with cash and have everyone pissed off at you.

** – Paypal fees apply

Package

Shirt Size (Unisex)

Hash Name / Home Hash

PayPal – The safer, easier way to pay online!

Coming in from out of town? Not to worry. There are plenty of options for getting to and from Chicago. You can always fly in O’Hare (ORD) or Midway (MDW), take the Amtrack in to Union Station, take the Mega Bus, or you could even carpool up with your closest hash friends.

Need crash space? Don’t worry about that either – shoot Two Girls, One Cupcake an email by 5pm on Monday, December 10th and she’ll coordinate with the rest of the Chicago H3 group to set you up with the perfect crash space partner (after that you’re on your own). Let her know how many people are coming, what nights you need crash space, and if you have any specific requests. If you’d rather find your own crash space you’re also welcome to post a message either in the comments, in our Yahoo! Group, on our Facebook page, via e-mail, or over our twitter, and we’ll do our best to set you up with a welcoming hasher. If you don’t want to stay with hasher, that’s cool too – the Chicago H3 suggests finding a room at the Travelodge Downtown Chicago as it is just a few blocks from the Main Event on Saturday. You can also try the Days Inn Lincoln Park or at the Chicago Getaway Hostel, but be advised that no group rate has been procured from these institutions.

Still not convinced? Let’s see who else is coming:

Hash Name Home Hash
Dewey Sexual System Big Hump H3
Snatchsquatch Chicago H3
Weird Al Spankabitch Blooming Fools H3
Just Ehhh Chicago H3
Feather Chicago H3
Three Inch King Big Hump H3
Lifa Chicago H3
2:19 From Chicago Big Hump H3
Free Mustache Rides Big Hump H3
Disco Ass St. Louis H3
Ass Capades Chicago H3
Clark Kunt Chicago H3
Two Hairnets Chicago H3
Lock Nut Monster Big Hump H3
Pool Job Chicago H3
O’Shitty Runch Chicago H3
That Thing That Vibrates Chicago H3
Two Girls, One Cupcake Chicago H3
Pees Like A Princess Big Hump H3
Ginger Snatch Chicago H3
Math Sucks, Let’s Fuck! DC Road Whores H3
Wreath Around White House H3
TrAInWrECk Big Hump H3
Just Brian #3 Chicago H3
Can’t Find Pussy In A Haystack DC Road Whores
Sucks the Dick Indy Scent H3
Corn Star Chicago H3
Return to Gender Madison H3
Hood Whorenament Chicago H3
Lucy St. Louis H3
Cuntput Indy Scent
Sphincter Grease Waukesha H3
Roll-On Washington DC H3
EOD Hill Country H3
Rhotan Second City H3
Just Mary Chicago H3
Fistful of Pricks Voodoo H3
Totally Anal Second City H3
Smells Like Twat Sweat Thirstday H3
Slippery Fingers Thirstday H3
Sandy Syphilis Chicago H3
Drill in my Box Chicago H3
Sorry I Swallowed Chicago H3
Chunder Pussy Chicago H3
Reverse Muff Diver Chicago H3
Chicken Stiffer Chicago H3
Poultry Fucker Chicago H3
Just Brian #42 VIRGIN RUN!
The Dark Kunt Thirstday H3
Back Door County Chicago H3
Hoosier Daddy Chicago H3
Just Noga Chicago H3
Glory Hole Chicago H3
Urine Love California Larrikins H3
Just Grace Thirstday H3
Faming Flaggett Dallas Urban H3 (DUHHH)
IV Dallas Urban H3 (DUHHH)
Cookie Cumster Waukesha H3
Finger Pricking Good Little Rock H3
Rotten Chicago H3
It’s Too Soft Waukesha H3
Brown Eye for the Gay Guy DC Road Whores

Where’s Everyone Coming From?

Kennel # Regoed
Chicago H3 29
Big Hump H3 6
Thirstday H3 4
DC Road Whores H3 3
Waukesha H3 3
Dallas Urban H3 (DUHHH) 2
Indy Scent H3 2
Second City H3 2
St. Louis H3 2
Blooming Fools H3 1
California Larrikins H3 1
Hill Country H3 1
Little Rock H3 1
Madison H3 1
Voodoo H3 1
Washington DC H3 1
White House H3 1