The Tale of the Trail
The Chicago Hash 20 Nov 2010 by Horn-E
We ran out of Soul Taco’s place where she was hosting the CH3’s annual Thanksgiving Hash turkey dinner. CH3 had to move this event to Sat to accommodate Soul Taco’s personal needs. So they mover the start back to 3PM so as to not conflict with the normal schedule of the Bushman Hash. Soul Taco had a partner in crime in Poultry Fucker in laying that trail. Actually the ladies laid a decent trail with some good loops, but you never heard it here. It was a shitty trail. Poultry Fucker was sweeping and led the beginning circle, with our virgin, Just John paying close attention. Like anybody else was. We had a pack of 12 hounds at the start and we were right off into the alleys of the area. Heading south east we hit a Check. Dark Side Of The Poon was seen up at Belmont on a False. Trail went south for a nice little loop that had the trail coming back to within about a hundred feet of earlier trail. But the pack was all following and no one managed that short cut. From here it was at least one gangway and down a couple of short alleys where Horn-E and R-Tard-E managed to catch a short cut to the pack and a Check at Kimball/Milwaukee/Diversey. This one had is going in circles. Crop Duster went way south on Milwaukee before trail was found to the north on Kimball. We wandered around several streets and finally through a school yard and a fence climb. Or run around if you were paying attention. But the pack was stretching out and we finally approached Logan Blvd and those at the back could just catch some hounds approaching the Logan Monument. Check. Naturally. And the lead hounds were already out of sight. Trail seemed to go west. Wrong. That is where Horn-E managed to accost some bimbo running along. Actually, she asked him if we were hashers. Meanwhile the pack disappeared to the south as Horn-E told her how to find out about us. It was about three blocks later before he caught the sweep, Are They Real and Salty Gash. But they were short cutting and Horn-E ran on, now off trail. As he wandered on, Poultry Fucker finally caught him to guide him back to trail and towards the beer stop. And a block later, there was the pack. And about three blocks later was the beer stop in a park along Diversey. Soul Taco was there with beer and Its Too Soft, arriving late, went with her to the beer stop. The pack was complete. Others on trail included Just Ian, Happy Ass Grabber and Turbo Dog, Goldilocks, Hump Me Dump Me, Just Mary and Rhotan. After a bit, the chills started and we headed back to the On In for some Taco Turkey. We found a bunch of couch potatoes along with the mashed potatoes waiting for us. They included Chicken Stifer, I Like Dick, Glory Hole and Ice Princess. Horn-E headed to the kitchen with knife and fork in hand for some KP. That’s Kutting Poultry, and not that Poultry. That’s carving turkey. And the circle commenced in the living room. I heard our Virgin, Just John, getting introduced, and the hares were constantly called out. After we settled into a good dinner with all sorts of side dishes to compliment the Turkey.