The Tale of the Trail
The Chicago Hash 7 Nov. 2010 by Horn-E
I walked into Kelly’s and the room had a lot of people standing around in running clothes, but who were they. New faces everywhere. Was our hare, Super Stuffer stuffing them in from joggers going by? Was the other hare Wizard Sleeves…., oh never mind. Yes, a virgin hare with wizard sleeves.
It looks like 15 regular hounds, one visitor, and eight virgins. Nice crowd, now if we only don’t lose all of the virgins on trail.
We didn’t lose the virgins thanks to a trail that kept most of the pack together. We started out down the alley to the south and then headed west as the pack strung out. As the pack headed down an alley, Lifa headed down the previous street, ranging again, and it worked and he got to a Check and apparently picked right in heading straight. But the pack was scattered looking for marks and we all took off to the south and into some angled streets and alleys. I got to the end of the block where the angled streets started and there was Lifa coming out of another street, blowing his weasle. I followed along with Muffin The Mule and we headed southeast again. This led to another alley and finally out to Sheffield. The trail was on the west side of the street and Chicken Stiffer was already on the east side of the street. At Clybourn there was a Check and trail apparently did go east and south down a long alley. Horn-E was falling way behind and caught the light. By the time he got to the alley, the leaders were already at the end of this long alley and the only hashers close were Just Mo and 10K Tika Ho. So he followed and 10K Tika Ho cut off into a parking lot. Horn-E followed and she was gone when he emerged. and there were no marks. Looking back towards the Check he noticed the hare, Super Stuffer and two others heading west from the Check. Returning to the Check, it was marked to the west, past Goose Island and over to the industrial area and then south on the tracks. At the end of the tracks there was a Check. Goldilocks was already returning from the west so Horn-E led some across the street and headed across the street to the other Goose Island. The one that is actually an island and not a brewery. As he approached the far end, the On call was called to the east. But this just went back north and here was the hare hiding behind a building with Hoosier Daddy and Poultry Fucker who was just walking. I didn’t see her again so maybe she couldn’t resist the mall and went shopping. As we headed north, we apparently just looped back over the out trail and got there just in time to rescue the DFL, Its Too Soft and saved him from doing the loop. Trail went on to the north and eventually into an area by heaps of crushed cars and scrap metal. Hear we heard a loud speaker telling us it was private property and to please leave. Well, at the far end of the private property there was a Check that took a bit to find because we stumbled onto a False trail coming off of the Check. Back to the Check, runners scattered and it was finally found to the west and then south just before the bridge. This led to a quick Check that apparently didn’t fool anyone. At least it was found by the time I got there with Goldilocks. About two blocks later was another Check and it was a long song check. Uploader led us in ‘Monday is a Wanking Day.’ Well done.
From here the trail was called to the north and we went to Webster and then to the east. Back to the bar? No. We headed north to a Check. By the time I got there, everyone was returning from all directions west and north and so we headed to the east. As we approached the next corner I saw Chicken Stiffer heading north, but I didn’t see any marks going that way. Huh. Trail apparently went east and we were soon on and then to the north and another Check. From here trail headed east on Fullerton and we passed a BN. Great. Another block and there was a Split. Some headed east and some headed north. North was on and two blocks later we were at the beer stop in an alley. Suddenly Chicken Stiffer came around the corner from the east, followed by Lifa. Hmmm. Did they assume the beer stop was at Its Too Soft’s place. Not. Finally we were all there. And then Rhotan and Calvin Klein showed up. To lazy to run with us, but they walked over for the free beer on the hares.
Speaking of non running wussies, you can add in Slippery Box, Soul Taco, Ice Princess, Fall On My
Wood, and our GM (?) Fistful Of Pricks.
Back at Kelly’s we headed into the beer tent where Calvin Klein attempted to run a decent circle. Rhotan intended to disrupt the circle at every opportunity. They both succeeded, or failed. When I got home I found an email from Rhotan that said he was going to try to hijack either our trail or circle. But Calvin Klein somehow managed to carry on and our hares got every other down down. He got Wizard Sleeves so drunk that she led us in a new Tit song after circle. Well done. And we did manage to sing several other long songs. But I am ahead of myself. We were also introduced to our visitor, Type A Hole. Then the virgins and newly moved to Chicago which included, Just Ben, Just Ryan, Just Katie, the munchkins Just Lisa and Just Beth, Just David, and two from the United Kingdom, Just Greg and Just Victoria. Welcome one and all and join us back in Chicago and many of our other local hashes.
Others who ran included Ginger Snatch, The Dark Kunt, Just Kevin, Soggy Deposits and Hump Me Dump Me. After circle and the late singing, we headed back into the bar and slowly left. A good time for such a shitty trail.