Tale of the Trail – CH3 #1567

Hash Trash
Chicago #1567
Oct. 5, 2008 House of Batteries

HARES: Calvin Klein and Batteries not Included
VISITORS: Film @ 11-Baltimore, Neon- Panama Hash,
HASHERS: Chicken Stiffer, Hoosier Daddy, Lifa, Ginger Snatch, Bloody Thighs, Mudsucker, I Like Dick, Just Tina, Sir Poops A lot, Horn-e, Mouthful of Meat, Super Stuf’her, KGB, Just I Lean, Cums On I Lean, R-Tard-E


Great hash today, I’m sure if the rain hadn’t scared a few people away we would have had our usually 30 hashers out on a Sunday trail. The Pack met at the bar and NEON was our first arriver. She looked anxious because she was hanging out at the door just waiting to run. The bar even made her play taps before she left for circle for the dead in the water Detroit Lions that the BEARS were killing today. CALVIN left 10 minutes before the pack did so he could set live trail with flour and BATTERIES conducted the chalk talk. All were set but we needed to introduce our hashers and give the visitors FILM @ 11 and NEON directions on how to follow our CH3 trail. LIFA led the pack out along with SIR POOPS A LOT and the rain started to subside and was replaced with the sun??? Trail went SE towards the Clark and Division red line stop with the pack following HORN-E and his blown horn. FILM @ 11 was seen stripping near this corner for $$$?? but it turned out she was only warm from the run. W’ALL BANGER bit the dust on this trail trying to accelerate around a corner she hit the wall in turn 3 and blew a wheel. KGB found the trail was now running east towards the lake and everyone was expecting a little hashing on the lakefront.

Our hares were a little too smart for that and circled back west away from the lake catching most of the pack looking east except for the CHICKEN STIFFER who ran into blobs of flour I went west on this unknown trail and HORN-E went east unfortunately he was not on and the trail continued in a NW direction until it ran behind the CHICAGO HISTORICAL SOCIETY. I even had time to run back and mark the last two checks and splits so the pack led by GINGER SNATCH could catch up. R-TARD-E played the part of HOT PANTS today running trail in his gym shoes and jeans. The trail here ran through the Lincoln Park area that has a statue of Ulysses S. Grant in it while Grant Park has a statue of Abraham Lincoln in it, odd huh? Trail continued north and then ran thru the zoo and our visit! ors were amazed that the zoo was free, that is the beauty of the Lincoln Park Zoo. Finally the trail came out of the zoo and BN was seen at last with the beer stop in the arboretum just north of the zoo. JUST I LEAN met us there with the hare CALVIN KLEIN!!! Soon hasher like BLOODY THIGHS and KGB were joining the FRB’s in downing a few beers before we ran over to the house of BATTERIES for circle and Yucca.

The house of BATTERIES found us with I LIKE DICK and JUST TINA waiting for us and soon we were joined with SUPER STUF’HER and MUDSUCKER as well. CALVIN ran the circle with the FRB being CHICKEN and DFL was W’ALL BANGER with the bum wheel trailing behind her. Our visitors were brought out and FILM @ 11 got her name for having sex on a fire engine that made the 11 o’clock news in Baltimore. NEON will only be here until Friday so come out and say goodbye to her on Thursday. I LIKE DICK had to drink every other down-down for refusing to run a CALVIN trail that only went about four-miles CALVIN kept the circle going and BATTERIES was cooking the pizzas, the YUCCA was started by LIFA and soon the whole circle was drinking YUCCA, but can anyone explain why in YUCCA the limes sank and the oranges and lemons floated??? BIG HASH MYSTERY that needs to be solved!!! Maybe more YUCCA at ANTHRAX HASH DEC. 20, 2008. The YUCCA was cared for and burped by CUMS on I LEAN today she treated the Yucca like a newborn with care and love as she cradled it to her bosom. CALVIN had a few more accusations and MOUTHFUL of MEAT was caught for auto hashing and LIFA and HOOSIER DADDY sang a train riding song because they took Metra to the hash. SEE you all next week at the MARATHON hash DOWNTOWN!!!


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