Tale of the Trail – CH3 #1565

Hash Trash Sept. 22, 2008 Casa De Stumpy
HARES: Stumpy and Virgin Banger
VIRGINS: Just Joe, Just Jessica, Just John, Just Hee-Jai, Just Julian
HASHERS: Just Shaina, Poultry F*cker, Glory Hole, Sir Poops A lot, Calvin and Hobbes, Batteries Not Included, R-tard-E, Snatchsquatch, Chicken Stiffer, Bang Me Blow Me Get Me Off, Virtually Hung, 69-cent Man, Carpet Shagger, Princess Labia, Ernest Cummingway, Likes It On the Bottom, Horn-E, It’s Too Soft, Renta Virgin, Cums On I Lean, Bella (Carry On), Just I Lean, Mount Schwinga, Crop Duster, Bank of Spermeica,
The hash tonight celebrated the birthday of VIRGIN BANGER and STUMP HUMPER two excellent hashers both turned 27 tonight congratulations. 32 hashers came out for the run and celebrations with 5 virgins joining us most of them came because of RENTA VIRGIN!!! The trail was a fine showing of the Loyola Campus and Rogers Park. We did a quick chalk talk and in the midst of it CROP DUSTER showed up on his bike as usually sweaty and out of breathe. After our instructions we were off with 69-CENT MAN leading us out to the first check. I went NW but was soon called back by CARPET SHAGGER because the trail went east. VIRTUALLY HUNG and GLORY HOLE looked to be leading at this point with HORN-E trying to keep up. The trail ducked under a fence now I was FRB. Trail ran towards the lake and finally did cross Sheridan and ran behind some bar looking place on the lake maybe a good place for future summer on in. It was here I lost the pack and became the FRB.
Trail ran thru the Loyola campus and had a false trial towards the parking garage true trail ran north and behind the soccer/track field. Here there was a split and the trail ran over some rock behind an Apartment building on the lake and up the beach on the north side. Trail from here ran west and south until we came close to the corner of Devon and Clark where PRINCESS LABIA waited with the beer. CHICKEN the FRB waited for the pack on our next hasher in was JUST SHAINA so now we had our FRB and FBI. Soon the pack followed with BANK OF SPERMERICA, CALVIN KLEIN, BATTERIES NOT INCLUDED, and others rolling in. Our virgin Just HEE-JAI made it quickly to the beer stop as well. We sat under the street lights sucking on our beers for about ten minutes when SNATCHSQUATCH and R-TARD-E showed up late where had they been and what they were doing was up for debate but they did find the beer stop the goal of any hasher.
The pack made it back to the ON-IN where CALVIN our RA led us in circle and soon had our FRB and FBI out. The DFL’s were GUESS whom R-TARD and SNATCHSQUATCH. OUR virgins Just Joe, Just Jessica, Just John, Just Hee-Jai, and Just Julian learned what a down down was from the woman formerly known as I’M LATE AGAIN. IT’S TOO SOFT made it in his high collared shirt and tie with MOUNT SCHWINGA who won an award for best dressed hasher at some event. RENTA VIRGIN was in some kind of orgy tonight because she made all the virgins cum and PRINCESS LABIA kept shouting buy raffle tickets!! Overall it was a great backyard hash that lasted until the neighbor couldn’t stand us anymore.


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