Virgins

Tradition: Any first-time visitors to the hash are affectionately referred to as “Virgins” and thus, must be introduced to the rest of the hash so that the hash might take advantage of them later. After the RA asks the Virgins their names (to which the circle responds “Hi Just …”), where they are from (Chicago is not an acceptable answer, it’s a big city), and who made them come, any number of other questions may be asked of the Virgins that include, but are not limited to:

  • What’s your favorite farm animal?
  • Who is your favorite porn star?
  • What’s your favorite water-bound mammal?
  • If you had to invest your life’s savings in any one stock for the rest of your life, which stock would you choose?

After this round of questioning, the art of doing a proper down-down is explained to the Virgins and one or more hashers are pulled into the circle to demonstrate. Usually they are greeted with the shortest hash song ever:

SHORTEST HASH SONG EVER

Melody – Itself

Ugh!

After a fellow hasher demonstrates a down-down, the Virgins are serenaded with one of several songs:

HERE’S TO THE VIRGINS

Melody – Itself

Here’s to the Virgins,
They’re true blue,

They are hashers,
Through and through,

They are pisspots,
So they say,

Tried to go to heaven,
But they went the other way.

WE’VE GOT VIRGINS

Melody – Frere Jacques

We’ve got virgins,
We’ve got virgins,

At our hash,
At our hash,

Gonna get ’em drunked up,
Gonna get ’em fucked up,

Down the hatch,
Up the ass.

Notes: Virgins can also be used to designate anyone who hasn’t been to specific type of hash before, often used at the smaller hashes in Chicago and for anyone who is attending their first dress run.


HASH TRADITIONS

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